Last week (and really every week) was CRAZY busy for me; however it was so good. A lot has happened, so I have a lot to cover from this past week.
I really feel as though I am thriving here.
I have been pretty hyped up on Mountain Dew because of all of the coffee I've gotten this past week. I had the opportunity to meet with so many amazing people at our local coffee shops (because that's really the only thing there is to do here in, middle of no where Stephenville, Texas). A few girls were interested in AOII, and a few I had met through the BSM; so either talking about Greek like or Jesus...or both.
I met this girl, AnnaBelle, walking to church one night, and asked her if she wanted to come with me... if that isn't a random, God-given way of meeting someone, I don't know what is. As I've gotten to know her this past week, I have come to realize that we are basically the same person (so obviously she's AWESOME). We both want to be a Jesus-loving granola girl, have similar testimonies, and laugh at the same jokes.
Making new friends is such an exciting, beautiful, fun, and at times vulnerable thing to do; and I have gotten to experience this on so many occasions here recently. The friendships that I have made at the BSM are in some ways deeper than the friends I've had for years. We really DIVE into our faith together, always being in a state of fellowship with one another.
James 1:17 "every good and pleasing gift is from above."
Before church on Thursday night, I got out of my comfort zone a little and went with a small group to do what they call, 'spiritual surveys' on campus. The premise of this is to walk around campus and share Truth, the gospel, invite people to church, etc. I was able to connect with a few people, and found that I am more outgoing than I thought I was. I really enjoyed it, and makes me feel very encouraged for this mission trip I am about to embark on. After church on Thursday, a group of us went to Sonic and hung out for a while in the FREEZING cold. The guys had fasted that day, so they ate enough to feed an army. I'm talking; two pizzas, hamburgers, shakes, fries, and popcorn chicken... it was quite impressive.
Friday morning I went to Beans and Franks (local coffee shop) with a group of people from the BSM for a small Bible study. My family may disagree with this statement, but my friends here think I am a morning person; I only had a few sips of my coffee and was just about bouncing off the walls at 8am. Despite the slight distraction that I was, we had a great study and it was neat to hear from people I don't normally hear from on the subject of faith. We read James 1, and talked about how we can apply the word to our lives. James 1:22 really stuck out to me; "But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves." I want to be a doer when it comes to my faith, not just solely offering lip service to people.
At work a new girl started a few days ago, and as I got to know her I found out she was from Kenya, and invited her to the BSM; so we'll see where that goes!
The next day a few girls invited me to go on a spontaneous trip to Waco with them, which was SO FUN. New friendships really is such an exciting thing, and I cannot wait to continually grow in friendship and faith with my new friends.
Now on to the nitty gritty...
There has been a lot of back and fourth with Laramie and I. Basically this boy couldn't make up his mind about me.
I hate that it has been so confusing, and really just makes our relationship look like a mess. However, I guess I am finally getting my dramatic love story.
Lucky for us, our God is a God of fresh starts. Thorough all of this turmoil, I have been at peace. At peace with the fact that things will work out exactly how they are supposed to. At peace with who I am in Him. At peace with the fact that I still pretty much thought that Laramie was who I was supposed to be with. We both wrestled with that fact a lot.
Laramie told me he couldn't get me out of his head, no matter what he tried to do. Everywhere he looked he'd see cheetah print or something (haha).
When he told me he was sorry about everything and knew that it was going to take a lot to have me back in his life, I immediately wanted to run into his arms and pretend like nothing happened. But I didn't. I know that I I am the prize. I knew that if he was really the one and we were really supposed to be together, that he would chase me.
We went on a date this weekend. He recreated our first date, sine I told him it was the best date I had ever been on. We really had a great time... he laughs at all my jokes, even the ones that aren't funny.
Since I met Laramie, he's blown me away with his smarts... so how could be be so dumb when it came to me?
I think a lot of it was fear of failure, due to things that he has been through or seen in the past. Fearful of not being able to love me well, failing at love, not putting God first... whatever it was, he let it get in the way twice.
I don't mean that out of spite, even though I will never let him live it down. I thought he was incredible when I met him, but he is somehow even more spectacular. I mean this guy LOVES God. He really lives out the scripture about mediating on the word day and night. He makes me want to chase and be more like Jesus everyday.
I was scared to add this in here. Fearful of what y'all may think. That it sounds like boy drama, high school, or whatever else. But from my experience with boys, sometimes they really are just dumb.. sometimes it takes them longer come around.
I am incredibly proud of the growth that I've seen in Laramie; and I am really happy. Really feels like everything is falling into place for me... all praise and thanksgiving to God.